I was thinking about daydreaming today… Actually I was daydreaming about daydreaming. And I’ve realised that daydreaming and over thinking are the same, just one is positive and the other negative. Basically if you say you’re daydreaming, it means you’re thinking about (un)important things, usually either happy, nice, or normal things that may or may not happen at some point. And it may be beneficial and relaxing to just stay and think of nothing in particular.
Over thinking on the other side means stress, negative emotions, expanding the alternatives so much that it almost hurts to think about anything. What if this will happen? Or that? Or maybe some other thing? When you’re thinking too much you may feel depressed. Cause your brain seems more appropriate to think about bad stuff, so that apparently you’ll be more prepared if they really happen. So you’ve mentally lived lots of alternative future moments, usually moments that are close in the future, not the ones that are further away. And you get tired. It’s like when a computer is programmed to go through a ”tree”, either depth first or breadth first. Let me explain if you don’t know the concept, before you decide that I’m too much of a geek for you. It’s an interesting concept actually, if you want to implement it for the way the human mind thinks. In the depth first, you take a possibility, then from that possibility you go – with your mind, in our case – to another possibility, and so on, going further into the future, and not coming back to check for other options that may have brached from the first one. This way you have a goal in mind, a goal that is further away, but you’ll definitely achieve it at some point. And you’re happy. ”Pass this year -> finish college -> get a job -> get married -> have children -> live happily ever after”
On the other hand, breadth first means to take each end every possibility that can happen from the present moment. You don’t go beyond this close period of time until you’ve gone with your mind through all the things that can happen in this particular amount of time. So you don’t look into the future, you’re just over thinking about everything that may happen from the current point. And you’ll end up tired before even going beyond tomorrow. ”What if he doesn’t like this dress I’m going to wear… Or my hair? Should I kiss him at the end? What if he doesn’t want to? But what if he does and waits for a sign?!”…
Then how can you set up a goal and go straight to it, if you’re about to get lost into these infinite amount of possibilities, that your mind really wants to take into consideration?! That’s what over thinking is. And then you’ll just blink, and you’ll wake up after that really small period of time which you were over analysing. And you’ll realise that only one path happened from all the possible ones that you could have thought of. And here you are, unprepared for the future, cause you were too busy, and so unable to look further away. So not only you are slowly going into some kind of a depression when you’re over thinking, but you also get tired, lose time, live lots of perhaps awful moments inside your mind – which have more chances not to become true, rather than becoming – and what for? Why struggling with thinking so much, instead of just leaving the things the way they are supposed to flow? Don’t overuse your thinking, no matter how much imagination you have – I admit I can’t hold mine under control, I keep over thinking and that’s why I get tired, afraid, even sad and confused, and totally unprepared for that goalless future of mine.
I know that when I’m writing I’m basically explaining my thoughts, and of course I’m over thinking. I’ve been told by so many persons that I think too much, instead of just living the moment, with its scent of mystery and unknown, and try not to go with my mind on each and every path I find. After all, some mysteries are supposed to remain mysteries, and our alternative lives is the best example for this that I can think of right now – of course I could think of much better ones, but that would be me over thinking, and I need a break.